You have to let her go

As men, we tend to find it quite difficult to let the most recent ex go *entirely*, even when the relationship has long since passed. It’s a mix of things including power, the intense want of not being forgotten, spite, etc. It is something most apparent in the beginning of the break-up phase, AND once the one time lady-friend has moved on to someone else.

 

I’m talking about when we just can’t let go. Using the spark of hope in a woman, or the love she may still have to keep them on our ropes; debilitating them in other relationships by not allowing them to fully move on.

 

I’m sure you know what that means, and probably have experienced it first hand, so I won’t get into that, instead I’m writing about severing those ties, even when it hurts.

 

It takes a mature, informed, and disciplined man to walk away from a failed relationship the right way. That means totally letting that woman go so that she can properly heal and move on. When we find out that that there is someone else, there is an impulse to grab back at her heart, even when we know that there is no chance of a renewed relationship.

 

To keep this short, my advice is,

 

For the men-Cut it off completely (that means phone, Facebook, Myspace, etc.), it’s hard I know, but you have to let her go—it’s only fair. Most likely you have moved on, so let her do the same. She will feel like you never cared because of this abrupt act, but you know what is best, and you have to go through with it.

 

For women-Cut him off completely. That tends to be easy for women in the very beginning while the novelty of new love remains, but when that cloud clears and small reminders of the past takes them back to a sweet memory of their former lover they become vulnerable, and trust me, the ex will know and use it. Just leave him alone, and don’t let him bother you. You will want to keep a friendship, but it will most likely lead to trouble; and why take that risk?